Are you ready to dismiss your individualism? Are you ready to be stereotyped? Then get reading bitches, I know you better than you know yourselves!
Q.1 The best movies are the ones that involve…
A) Violence, gross stuff and some hot stuff that contributes to the plot in no way at all
B) Realism and profound meaning, with a bit of enlightenment chucked in too
C) Sappy sappiness with happy happiness and shiny things
D) You not having to pay for them
Q.2 You are in a bar and money is no object, which of the following are you most likely to order…
A) Bourbon and coke
B) Wine or imported beer
C) Some kind of Vodka/ Soda combination
D) Red bull and Vodka assuming you have run out of drugs
Q.3 Hooray its holiday time! Ideally your time off would be best spent
A) Getting drunk in Queensland
B) Exploring Europe
C) A ski resort trip with your large group of best friends
D) Finding out how many kinds of weird and unhealthy things you can do to your body without having to take a permanent holiday
Q.4 Your best friend calls you up to cancel last minute on a night you both had organized for ages because they’re “too fucked cos they had a big one out the night before”. Your first reaction is to…
A) Yessss, now you have an excuse to watch CSI, followed by CSI Miami, CSI Boston, CSI Texas, CSI San Fran, CSI Mexico and CSI Arctic
B) You tell them its ok but secretly resent them
C) You sulk and eat ice-cream
D) You bite their head off and tell them they “fuckin suck”, then you down a bottle of spirits and dance around in your underwear
Q.5 Your sexual exploits can only be described as
A) Fast and furious
B) Well thought out and personal
C) Ho hum but you always get stuff on Valentines Day so suck!
D) Diverse, random, excessive bordering on shameful
Q.6 Your're out at you fave venue, your type of music is pumpin’ and it’s definitely your scene. Which best describes your dancing?
A) You aren’t keen on dancing but if someone attractive asks you to, then you’re not going to miss an opportunity to rub up against them
B) You always look stylish on the dance floor, you are “the bomb”
C) Your dancing is appropriately flirty and you always look like you’re having the time of your life, regardless of whether you feel like topping yourself
D) You don’t dance…until you start peaking. Then one style is never enough, it has to be all of them! All at once!
Q.7 Some narcissistic little Blogger has asked you to visit their blog, what do you do?
A) Its gotten to the point where they’ve showed up at your house with their laptop and connected you to the net while watching you like a hawk. So you, a little nervous and afraid decide to have a look at their damn blog. You get bored instantly, don’t leave a comment and shoo the blogger out of your house with a broom.
B) Have a read, leave a brief comment and then ponder about starting your own blog.
C) Get online immediately and leave a loving comment, mostly a personal greeting and not really regarding the content of the post.
D) Once you’ve finished updating your OWN blog you take a peek and leave a really excited, involved comment possibly longer than the post itself.
Results! (may offend some losers)
Mostly A's = Sick Fucker
You are probably a guy and if you aren’t then you should consider a sex change. Anyways you’re essentially a bogan, with less class than Paris and Nicki put together. I can’t believe you’ve read this all the way through, shouldn’t you be yelling at a tv in a pub somewhere? You have low-brow tastes, but I guess that means you’re easy to please. Don’t stress now, there are ways to improve like maybe killing yourself and donating your beer soaked, sleazy body to science.
Mostly B's = “Good” Samaritan
By “good” I actually mean that you play it by the book but inside you’re just the same as the rest of us; bitchy and self centered. You have taste but that also makes you pretentious. What annoys me most about you guys is that you so everything so well it makes me sick. However I believe this is a result of hidden self esteem issues and constant yearning for self improvement and perfection. You work to hard trying to be awesome, take some time out .
Mostly C's = Care Bear
Yeah that’s right, rainbows come out of your arse you goddamn happy fucker. You are a sweet flittery socialite who’s so incredibly normal that I personally would never sleep with you (and this is probably a good thing). I hope something really bad happens to you.
Mostly D's = Svet!
Oh my fucking god! You ARE me, stop trying to steal my identity loser.
Well that’s enough! That took much longer than expected to write. To think I could’ve been doing something really cool (cooler than blogging? Never!) , with all that fucking time I just wasted. Well guys, I would love to hear what you ended up categorised as, so I can judge and belittle you. Tee hee hee.
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7 comments:
In a word, ADBBDDD. I could analyze that a number of ways..
Svet's Diagnosis:
14.30% Bogun -> I am male after all, so the beer/violence/sex (in that order, woman) thing is at the core of my DNA, so bite me.
28.70% Good Samaritan -> If this is my attempt to hide self-esteem issues then power to me.
00.00% CareBear-> Damn, and I thought I was a people person. Oh well, at least I have maximum 'sleeping-with' potential at this point.
57.00% Svet -> I'm over half you? Phfft. You're half me, and wish you were more.
Well that was about as conclusive as question time in Parliament. Let's take another approach..
Apparently there's some.. thing, called Numerology. This is where hippies that were too busy smoking pot behind the bike shed in high school, burning their bras and riding bicycles listening to Simon & Garfunkle, woke up one day and realised they needed money to survive in this capitilist society of ours. So after a particular sticky mix of THC-laced resin, they convinced themselves they could 'divine' things from looking deeply into numbers, and how they have really have no bearings on our lives, but could, in theory.
That is all well and good, but the sad part is some people believed these con-artists. For those of you out there, I give you Stu-nology (warning: the following passage may be considered offensive by the number-challenged).
The letters ADBBDDD could be rewritten as 1422444, where a=1, z=26. Now the most common number is 4. Adding the first 4 numbers (1+4+2+2) gives 9 (I).
I is also Roman for 1, so we take the first number (1) and get (A).
We have 2 letters of the great divine answer so far. Given the first 2 numbers of our sequence add to 5 (1+4) - we will add the first 5 numbers (1+4+2+2+4), resulting in 13 (M).
We have only added parts of the sequence 2 times so far, so by adding the lot (1+4+2+2+4+4+4) and taking away 2, we get 19 (S).
Our answer is 7 letters long and we now have 3 more to calculate -> the last result (19) + the said 3 = 22 (V). Oooh, a double number - this answer is truly accurate.
Following this recent crop of 2's (we must listen to signs such as this), we add the first 2 numbers (1+4) for 5 (E). We then add 2 to get 7. Usually this would be the letter G, but you always reverse the code (a=26, z=1) at the end for duality. So now 7 = (T).
If you followed all that, stop smoking so much pot, and you will have come up with the correct solution: I A M S V E T.
Omg.. I really am you. My stomach hurts.. I'm off to find an exorcist *runs*
I'm Lucy.
I'm OK with that.
Better than being Svet, I spose.
--
Just kidding, baby. ;-)
well svet that was a thoroughly entertaining and enlightening quiz. dont suppose you actually wrote those questions for specific people now did you. very unlike that which teacher are you quiz you wrote for en masse. well i'll let you guess which type of person i was coz i dont think it will be that hard for you to figure out. if you replaced a few of the swear words with some kinda sappy feel good ultra modern terms you could send that into cosmo and make some money off of their fat arses! by the way who is forunecat? they wrote some seriously weird shit in their comment...
love you heaps!!
lucy xxxxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooooooo
Heya Lucy!Fortunecat is my cool friend Stu from earthcore. He is the tall, blue eyed one in the blog photos.
Anyway thanks for commenting, i miss your love even if you are a care bear face!
Okay Svet. After much harrassment I've finally gotten round to commenting on your blog. Though I hope you realise I'm taking time-out from my life as an awesome dancer. Just another thing to sectretly resent you for i guess.
Anyway, my result for your HOLY FUCK, Look at the nipples on that Amazon Warrior Queen... sorry... I was just distracted by a random titty sceen on 'Death Stalker 4'. I'm sure that sceen didn't fit in with the plot but hey, nothing another Kilkenny won't fix.
Anyway, as I was saying, I've got the results for your blog quiz. I got T-A-K-E-L-S-D
You didn't have the results for that one so you'd better just email me them.
Okay gotta go. I've got a date with an old friend from my childhood. We randomly ran into each other the other day at the existentialist cafe in St Kilda. After a long discussion about 'determinism vs free-will in modern day sexuality', we decided on a whim that the only way to rectify our slow drifting appart, as childhood sweethearts, was to become really intimate, really quickly. So we're meeting up to have sex. And then afterwards we're going to write and exchange essays about how it made us feel.
Seeya later
seb
Seb! You've been drinking, yes? You've gotta post after you've been drinking more often, man! That break-down of the Ninja Turtles as potential romantic partners was inspired! And so is this little convoluted anecdote.
Keep it up! Or, write your own blog!
they were my real results! You have to read closer svet. and no it wasn't some alcohol inspired rant alex. i just turned my answers into a short story. ABDBBBA. though i did mix up the order for the story. its all there. the violent movies with random hot stuff (Death Stalker), the imported beer (Kilkenny), taking drugs on the holidays (T-A-K-E-L-S-D). all my answers are there. Refer to your own quiz answers.
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