Lightening hurt me

Whats the best excuse for not updating your blog? Why,... that your house got hit by lightening, of course! This happened to me last friday night, I wasn't home cos I was out living it up to max with my hip crew, so I missed the big BANG BANG! Yeah i'm sure lightening sounds like BANG BANG cos I know stuff like that. Anyways, it shook my house up real good, the clock went flying off the wall, expensive vases smashed, and the phone blew out of the wall and also took a trip across the room. Of course this all happened the weekend mum decided to go away to Lorne. But lightening damage isn't really high on the ME-DESTROY-HOUSE scale as I've mentioned in past entries. In fact, I smashed a coffee plunger just yesterday.Woo! So mum didn't even seem entirely surprised when she heard the electrifying news. (sorry that was lame)

Now I like stuff like lightening strikes, cos theyre uber exciting and intruigingly unnecessary, much like speaking German when you really dont need to. Lightening is big and dramatic which means I'm allowed to go cray-Z (like Jay-Z) with font, which is something I never do. Unfortunately my Dad doesn't share my joy of exciting things, so when he stopped by my place and found it all smashed up he got all freaked and crazy. (A refreshing change from his normal angry and tense mode) He called me immediately when he saw the damage and did what he does best, blame and yell. This was not taken so well by yours truly on the other line. I was groggy and drug fucked and really mad that my phone had woken me at this obscene hour, which turned out to be 3:30pm.
I was glad when "mad-dad" had hung up and I could resume sleeping in my friend's bed, even though he'd left home a good three hours earlier.

So to get back to my 'delayed blog update' story, permanent damage had occurred to several appliances...NO heating, No phone, and No computer. I was especially sad that my 2000 word cinema essay had also been lost. I mean stuff like that just isn't fair. Bad things always happen to hard workers like myself.I started that baby the day after it was due and had written a good 600 words of it, no justice in this big cold world. Yeah thats a good note to end on, cruel cruel nature and all those dirty hippies encouraging it. I hate hippies, and old people, and small animals and definately vegans. I ate vegan food by mistake today, so I spat it out and gargled metho and got the waiter in a headlock on the floor. (Alex will tell you thats a lie, but what does she know?... just cos she was there)
Wait! I found a better note to end on... a quote from a Cottee's cordial bottle...
"We make everyday drinking fun!" hahahahahahahahahahahahaha ahem. now excuse me I have to go tie a hippy to a tall tree and wait for more lightening.